Before You Say Yes: What Every Woman Should Know Before She Says I Do

You already know how to fall in love. This book is about what to do before you say yes. Dean Marc Merrill has officiated more than a thousand weddings: on the sand at El Matador Beach, in the gardens of the Four Seasons Biltmore, at the Ritz-Carlton Bacara, and in hundreds of backyards and vineyards across Southern California where couples turned an ordinary space into the place they got married. But the ceremony was never the real work. Before Dean ever stands at the front of the room, he sits down with every couple and listens to their story: how they met, what drew them together, what makes them work. Twenty-nine years of hearing those stories up close, and twenty-nine years of premarital counseling with the same couples, have taught him what most people never get the chance to learn: what actually makes a marriage last, and what quietly predicts one that won't. This book is that education, handed to you. Before You Say Yes isn't about finding a man. You can do that. It's about knowing what you've found before you commit your one life to it. Inside, you'll learn: Why your gut already knows, and the three things that silence it every time How to use dating apps without letting them use you The eight types of men who will cost you years, and how to spot each one early What dating conceals and marriage reveals The four qualities that matter more than chemistry, income, or charm. Not four hundred. Four. How to know whether the relationship is actually going somewhere, and how long it really takes to find out What the right man actually looks like, once you know what you're looking for Dean is a man writing this for women, and he knows that might sound strange until you understand why. Twenty-nine years of premarital counseling means twenty-nine years of men speaking honestly when there was no woman in the room to perform for. He has counseled deeply religious men and men with no faith at all, and learned the same thing about both: character does not sort by belief. It shows up, or it doesn't, in every kind of man. Dean doesn't write from a pedestal. His own marriage ended, and it cost him more than he ever expected a choice to cost. He has lived both sides of what this book is about: choosing wrong, and years later, learning what choosing well actually looks like. The right choices in this book are not always the obvious ones. Neither are the wrong ones. They look almost identical at first. This book teaches you the difference. The choice is yours. Make a wise one.